Know your Man: Being a Provider

“The man has the gradually sinking feeling that his role as provider, the definitive male activity from the primal days of the hunt through the industrial revolution and on into modern life, has been largely seized from him; he has been cuckolded by it." ~ George Gilder

Men feel fulfilled when they work. It makes them feel good to be able to provide for their loved ones. Working makes us feel productive and self-confident, among other things, but we shouldn’t deny them the satisfaction of being the family’s breadwinner, if it is important to them. It is part of their make-up.

For a year, I lived in the woods in upstate New York with my son, who was 7 at the time. I used to call our house the “Little Ridding Red Hood Cabin,” it was so far removed from civilization.

One day, my then boyfriend decided to spend a whole Saturday collecting wood for my woodstove. He worked very hard all day and as a result of his hard work, I had tons of little bundles of kindling wood, to start my fire in the winter.

He was exhausted but he had this incredible felling of accomplishment at the end of the day. He said: “It makes me feel good to provide for you.” There. I rest my case.

And, by the way, those little bundles came in really handy. Even though he never knew this for he soon vanished from our lives (indeed a blessing), I never ceased to appreciate him for doing such great service for me and my son. It was a indeed a great help.

A Word of Advice:

Ladies: Let’s not deny them the satisfaction of being the major provider, even if they make less than we do. This is a pride kind of thing and they will lavish us with their gratitude.

Gents: Feel good and proud that you are providing for your family, no matter what criticism you may receive. Nobody can take this great feeling away from you.