UFO: Dinosaur Poop

Who says that nothing good can come out of Washington, D.C.? The Associated Press reported that Dinosaurs ate grasses. Scientists have found grasses in their poop.

It was in the journal Science. Scientist didn’t think that Dinosaurs had the teeth for grass. They liked to chew on palm tree bark and ferns like in the movies. (I added this last sentence for color.)

It seems that the scientist were confused about grasses too. They sprouted much sooner than they thought. I guess they didn’t read the Bible account.

Here is a quaint sentence extracted by AP from the article: “Most people would not have fashioned that they would eat grasses.”

That was said by Caroline Stromberg of the Swedish Museum of Natural History. She should know!

I’ll bet that museum is in Stockholm and I missed it when I was there! It was that gambling-for-fun table in the hotel lobby.

Most folks out here in Idaho certainly would not have fashioned that dinosaurs ate grasses.

However, I have fashioned that cows evolved from dinosaurs. Now that Science has printed the report that dinosaurs ate grasses, I now have the proof!

I thank you researchers!

The reason I know that cows came after the dinosaurs is that there are still plenty of cows around. They can scamper away from wolves, bears, and dingoes, but could not from dinosaurs.

I heard that shuffle again. Without looking I said, “SCRAM Xrytspet!”

“You’re writing a bunch of crap again Taylor Jones, the hack writer.”

I said, “What do you know about it?”

“Cows did not descend from the dinosaurs. We brought them here so that our babies would have milk in 218892888376 B.Y.”

I said, “B.Y.?”

“Before You, Dodo!”

At least she didn’t call me idiot, like she usually did. I said, “I don’t believe you, Xrytspet!”

The next thing I knew we were standing in a vast savannah. A huge space ship landed and out came a herd of cows. Out of nowhere, a herd of Tyrannous Rex came running toward the cattle. Zit! Zit! Zit! The dinosaurs all lay dead.

“Good Heavens, Xrytspet!” I said, “Now I know what happened to the dinosaurs!”

“They didn’t kill the all,” said Xrytspet. “You are such an idiot!”