Use Your Mental Mouse
Have you ever wished you could take your computer mouse with you
into your off-line life? When you're looking for a parking space near
that new restaurant, wouldn't you like to pull down a menu of options
and click on "find a spot 2 blocks away"? When you realize you have
just introduced your spouse to your colleague Justin Case but called
him the wrong name, don't you wish you could just highlight the whole
transaction and delete it? Well, I contend that you actually have a "Mental Mouse" which you
can learn to use to your great advantage. Here are some ideas to
spark your imagination. SAVE Often the answers to our challenges are visible to us, but they flit
by so quickly that we hardly notice them. They occur to us in the
form of fleeting ideas or images which we may not even register. Or
we dismiss or disregard them. This needs to change. Harvesting
images and ideas that are vibrant and compelling can be a critical
step in moving forward in our lives. Capturing them for later
consideration can make a difference. Here's what to do. When one of these images appears, use your
Mental Mouse and click "save." This is your way of saying to
yourself, "This is a compelling idea. I will remember it." As soon
as you can, jot it down on a piece of paper, or write it to a computer
file. Do this regardless of whether it's practical, realistic,
reasonable or whether it passes any of your other requirements for an
idea "worth keeping." Now it's saved. You can look at it later. Many of these images
come from your intuition or your inner wisdom. They are worthy of
your consideration. Some you will reject, but others can lead you
deeper into the life you dream of. EMPTY YOUR RECYCLE BIN My computer misbehaved several days in a row recently. When I asked my Computer Wizard about it, he told me to check my recycle bin, that
perhaps it was overflowing and needed to be emptied. The truth? I
had completely forgotten about the recycle bin. When I looked, I was
appalled to find probably a year's worth of "deleted" files. HAH!
They weren't deleted REALLY. I used my mouse to empty that recycle
bin, and got rid of those files once and for all! My computer once
again became docile, servile, and even perhaps a bit ingratiating. What a great metaphor! How often do we do this in our lives? We
THINK we've gotten rid of something because we've "deleted" it, that
is, removed it from view. But it lurks!! It is still really there
for us, below daily consciousness, waiting to be called back into
service, eating up our energy, zapping our memory, using up precious
creative and productive juice. What's in your personal recycle bin? It could be an ancient,
obsolete image of yourself that you are still fighting, say as a
sloppy 6-year-old, even though your work is meticulous, your
reputation is sterling, and your personal appearance and home are
impeccable. I have worked with affluent clients at midlife who still
carried with them an image of themselves living hand-to-mouth as they
had in their younger years. These outgrown images of yourself can be
emptied! They are not serving you. Ditto for the "I should have's:" I should have gone to medical
school. I should have married the other guy. I should never have
left South Dakota. These may be serious hints about actions you need
to take to make your present life better - in which case, take the
actions: make a move into a science career, or just start taking some
courses. Get clear what's missing in your marriage and enroll your
partner in creating it with you. Identify what you miss about South
Dakota and find it where you are. Or visit South Dakota and remind
yourself why you left! But let go of the "should have's." They are
big time energy thieves. What's lurking in your recycle bin? Grab the hand of a trusted
friend and go have a look. Use your mental mouse to let go of what
you no longer need. DETACH I recently wrote an email and attached a file to send with it. By
mistake I attached the wrong file. So I detached that file and
attached the correct one. I was struck with how easy it was! When you're stuck in a traffic jam, stressing out because you're
late for a meeting, wouldn't you like to click "detach" and just
release all of that tension? You actually can, by using your Mental
Mouse and choosing to detach from this and other attachments (to a
particular outcome) that are not serving you well. Have you ever had to work on a project with someone you just don't
like? Or someone who doesn't seem to like you? This can be
difficult, especially if you have high needs for connection or being
appreciated. You have obviously already clicked "attach" earlier in
the process, or you wouldn't be so invested in creating a particular
outcome: people liking each other. But the truth is, once you're
aware of what you're doing, you can mentally click "detach," and
support yourself to be okay with whatever the outcome is. This
actually leaves you freer to do your best work. Notice when you are stressing out. Use your Mental Mouse and detach. COACHING TIPS 1. Play with the idea of a Mental Mouse.
2. Stop and take notice when you wish you could "click."
3. Identify the human action you need to take.
4. Take that action. Copyright Sharon Teitelbaum. All rights reserved.
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